This is From The Balance Beam

[TheBalanceBeam] - Attraction in Action

======================================================================
THE BALANCE BEAM
Ideas and Inspiration for Creating a Life that Works
Vol. 2 No. 15, July 21, 2000
Published by Success Builders, Inc.
http://www.SuccessBuildersInc.com
======================================================================
"He who knows others is wise; he who knows himself is enlightened."
Lao-tzu
In this issue: ATTRACTION IN ACTION
====================================================================== Dear Friends:
How attractive are you? In this issue of The Balance Beam we take a look at the notion of "attraction"; not attraction in the traditional physical sense, but in a new way, that reflects a balanced way of being.

If you want to check out earlier editions of The Balance Beam that you may have missed, you can easily retrieve them by clicking on http://www.successbuildersinc.com/newsletter.html and going to the Archives section. If you are not yet a regular subscriber to The Balance Beam, you can also enter your subscription information at this location.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Today's Topic: ATTRACTION IN ACTION

There's an old saying that goes, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." I'm reminded of this every time I think about the process of "attraction". When someone is described as being attractive, we typically think about their physical attributes: how pretty or handsome or stylish they are. Popular media reinforce this perception. People magazine has its annual lists of the best-looking men and women in the world, Sports Illustrated has its swimsuit edition, and the Miss Universe pageant, despite attempts to the contrary, remains primarily a beauty contest.

There's another dimension to the notion of attraction, one that goes deeper than the surface level stuff. It has to do with our ability to attract the circumstances, situations and people that we want in our lives by virtue of "having our act together." When you think about it, we're always attracting things into our lives, some good and some bad. The idea behind putting attraction into action is to intentionally grow ourselves into a place where we naturally attract the circumstances that bring us joy, happiness and satisfaction, rather than attracting problems and hassles.

Now, before you dismiss this as some sort of metaphysical mumbo-jumbo, consider this: All of us know people who seem to really be "in the flow of life." Think of that person you know who always seems optimistic, upbeat, energized, resilient, and happy. This is the person who all of us look at and say to ourselves, "I want some of what she has." Has this individual found a way to escape all of life's difficulties? Hardly. But it typically IS someone who has chosen to live her life in a way that attracts positive energy and repels problems.

So what are the steps to becoming incredibly "attractive"? Is there a formula that we can follow that can enable us to step into the flow of life and stop struggling after what we want? Believe it or not, there really are specific steps that can lead to becoming more attractive to a high quality life. Try these on for size:

1. Develop a clear vision, purpose and understanding of what matters to you. Stephen Covey views this process as creating a "mission statement" for your life. Identify your core values, and center your life around them. Do your daily habits, behaviors and how you spend your time reflect what you really care about? If not, focus on aligning the two.

2. Practice extreme self-care. There's a difference between self-care and selfishness. Taking very good care of yourself means placing a priority on nourishing your body, mind and soul. It involves prioritizing things like exercising and taking time for healthy meals, rather than getting around to it if there's time left over from the "real work" of life.

3. Simplify your life. Take a look at the involvements and commitments you have. Is your life one long list of to-do's? How about the material things you surround yourself with. Do they bring you joy, or are the boat, the jet-ski, the RV, the swimming pool, the sports car, simply more things you have to find a way to finance and maintain? This is not a suggestion to lead a spartan, austere existence, but simply a nudge to once again, decide what matters.

4. Strengthen your communities. Stepping into the flow of life involves acknowledging the interconnectedness of people. A key element in attraction is about developing a closeness and a kinship with communities of friends, family, and colleagues. It's a give and take that implies being of service as well as sharing your own needs and vulnerabilities.

5. Commit to excellence. There's nothing quite as attractive as an individual who commits to high standards of learning, growing and excellence in their daily activities. Notice I didn't say being the best, which implies a competitive position, but being excellent. A commitment to excellence is a key element to attraction, regardless of whether we're talking about being an executive, being a store clerk or being a parent.

Perhaps the most important lesson about attraction is that it comes from a place of accepting, honoring and buffing up exactly who we are, rather than always struggling after more. Ironically, fashion maven Coco Chanel said it best: "Adornment is never anything but a reflection of the self."